Special Edition Matt Post "Mostly healthy but missing a crucial limb"

If you guessed we were having a boy, then I appreciate your optimism, but you’re wrong.  Yep, we will be out of diapers and into tampax before you know it.  I’m not saying I’m disappointed, but…….I’m a bit disappointed.  I just want to look back on fatherhood and say “that was a fun adventure”, NOT, “well, that was expensive.” I thought I would write quick public letter to my girls so they can understand what I mean.

To Maylee and the other one (we don’t have a name yet),

First of all, you need to understand that my job is heavily focused on numbers and finding ways to improve an investment.  Therefore, with the facts that I do have, you girls are a risky investment.  More accessories come with the girls.  Boys are good to go with pants and a tee shirt. With the exception of church, school, or those annoying 7-Elevens where they force their main clientele to put on clothes to make a purchase, boys can go without one or the other, most of the time.  In fact, boys aren’t even expected to know how to zip up their zipper till about 12 years old, and even then it’s funny if they forget.  Currently, I get in trouble with Mickie if I let Maylee leave the house without a headband, or if I put the headband on the wrong way.

I guess I just understand boys better than girls, so I was hoping to be able to win an argument or two every once in a while.  Now that Ty and I will be outnumbered by the girls, it’s reasonable to suspect that I will be wrong more than right from now on.  In the world of money management, you don’t have a job very long if that is the case.

Then there is the issue with the sporting events or lack thereof.  When you are cheering at the game, you might catch my eyes drifting towards the game.  Sorry, I know I am supposed to be watching you but they are charging me $7 dollars at the door to watch the game.  They don’t have a discount price for the fathers who are there to watch their daughter cheer.  I’m just trying to get what I paid for.

That leads into my next point.  It’s risky to invest in something you know nothing about.  When boys play with toys, it’s simple. You can rarely go wrong when your gun always hits its target or the rules can change to ensure victory every time.  You can see why I don’t look forward to losing the made up arguments between Barbie and Ken, because he forgot to do the dishes while Barbie was out shopping, again. It’s just sounds a bit too real for play time.  And to be honest, it’s not fair that you girls will practice the drama at such a young age. 

Above all else, you should know, I will give it my best, but lets’ rely on your mom for most of the advice.  Also, I will love you forever.

Your Dad.

Mickie's addition : This is post 1000 for the Spence Family blog, that's a lot of blogging! We do it for you, but we also do it for our kids. In 16 years Matt and I will probably look back at this post and laugh with our girls, understanding the sarcasm and stereotypes employed. YES we know our girls don't HAVE to be cheerleaders who like tea parties and play with Barbies. I was about the exact opposite of that myself. However it is fun to play off the stereotypes for now.